I’m not trying to tell God how to do his job, but I do have a few pointers.
Let me back up. Yesterday, I spent a full 20 hours without even touching my phone. This magnificent feat of self-control came about because I lost my phone.
It’s a long story, and it involves a tragically stupid string of bad choices on my part, but where it ended was me ripping open a bag of wet dirt and bits of broken glass, and not finding my phone in there, and then hoisting that up and ripping open a second bag of wet dirt and bits of broken glass that was under the first one, and there, buried in the dirt, was my phone. It still turned on, and I was glad to have it back. Mostly.
I do need my phone. I really do. But I need it for far less than I actually use it, and it was a nice 20 hours without it. I didn’t read a single headline about the president. I didn’t get in any fights with strangers over things I don’t know much about. I didn’t scroll miserably past hundreds of ads for things I couldn’t afford. I didn’t watch any videos of morbidly obese people getting yelled at or of hoarders weeping over their dirty junk.
And it was easy to say my prayers, because I didn’t have my phone making the case that it, and not God, deserved my attention first.
Without my phone, I sat outside in the morning sun and slowly drank my coffee. I listened to the birds and tried to figure out who they were without the aid of an app. I went down to the stream and collected some pretty bits of porcelain that had washed up and lodged in the banks. I fed the duck and collected their eggs; I washed my hands; I prepped dinner in peace. And then I went back outside and made one last-ditch effort to find my phone. And then I found it.
This is a long way of telling you that I know very well, and have known all along, that I use my phone too much. I know what it’s doing to me (making me dumb and mean and boring and sad) and to my life (making it hard to get anything done). But it’s also doing enough good things, and desirable things, and habit-forming things, that it’s super, super hard to put it down.
So yesterday, God yoinked it right out of my pocket and buried it in trash where it belongs, and then he left me to draw my own conclusions.
This is a good start, but I think He could take this approach further, because I have a lot of bad habits that I could use some help getting ahead of. I think he may not realise how dumb I am and how devoted to ruining my life. He gives me too much credit, and believes I have free will, and that it would be more valuable for me to decide to build virtue, rather than being forced into it like a rabid raccoon into a cage. I’m not telling God how to do His job. But I do have a few pointers.
He could make all the gross, unhealthy food in my house disappear, so I wouldn’t eat too much of it. He could filter out the unwholesome forms of entertainment I find shamefully appealing, so I wouldn’t waste my time and degrade my heart pursuing them. He could make the foolish, annoying people vanish so I wouldn’t even be tempted to get into conflicts with them.
He could make me strong and healthy and whole and give me meaningful and pleasant ways to spend my time and use my gifts. He could make for me a home with no anxiety, no fear, no suffering, no pain. He could, in fact, put me in a beautiful spot where all my needs are cared for and I am surrounded only by good and beautiful things – some sort of garden, perhaps. He could spend time with me, walking with me in the cool of the evening.
He could give me everything I need and everything I want, and ask very little of me, just making it abundantly clear that He loves me and wants only good for me. All he would have to do is ask me not to hurt myself on purpose for no reason. That’s all!
It would be foolproof.
If things were set up that way, I absolutely know I would stay on the straight and narrow, and be happy and good and healthy and wise, just like God wants. It would work, guaranteed, no doubt about it. The more I think about it, the more it surprises me He hasn’t tried this yet.
And I’m gonna suggest it to Him. Right after I just check one quick thing on my phone.
Simcha Fisher is the author of The Sinner’s Guide to Natural Family Planning. Her website is www.SimchaFisher.com.
