This semester, my students had to do a group assignment. Ask any student about group assignments and you will hear enormous groans.
Group assignments need a good work ethic, the ability to compromise, and some flexibility. But students usually aren’t very good at this stuff yet.
We make them start with a written plan that gives specific tasks to specific people, creates a regular meeting schedule, and sets deadlines.
And yet, with the best will in the world, the plan doesn’t always work out. Students will tell you that someone in the group always tries to take over the whole project.
Someone else doesn’t do any work. Someone else decides to save the day at the last minute but moans about it constantly. And someone speaks English as a second language and is struggling but won’t ask for help.
Yes, there’s a lot to hate about group assignments. But their sheer awfulness also makes them a brilliant introduction to the adult world. I tell my students that when they get a full-time job, they’re very likely to become part of an existing team.
They will meet the same people that they did at uni: control freaks, lazy people, would-be martyrs, and people who won’t ask for help.
They will discover that everyone is busy, no one’s schedules align, and lots of meetings end up being held via email or WhatsApp.
They will also learn that there is no point blaming each other via circular firing squad when things don’t work out as planned. Where am I going with this? Our salvation history as the people of God is the ultimate group assignment.
It’s paradoxical because our life story and judgement are completely individual. But how these two things turn out for us depend entirely on how we engage with and treat other people.
Other people are not the bug in our salvation; they’re the feature. They’re the raw material of our conversion – metanoia – into holy people. God made us to be social creatures. We really do need other people to help us grow in holiness.
We cannot get to heaven on our own. If we’re alone all the time, then we are not being chipped, carved, scraped, and abraded into what God wants for us.
It might feel great to be left alone and not pestered by other people. But like a lot of other things that feel great, it’s not good for you. Even hermits, who have a very rare vocation, still need other people. It’s not just them and God in a happy little bubble.
Other people are the unpredictable factor in our spiritual lives. We can sit quietly with God in prayer, but then we have to deal with other people and quickly get irritable.
God knows this. He doesn’t expect you to like everyone, but you do have to love them. You have to wish them well in your heart, forgive them when they offend you, and pray for them. But you don’t have to live with them, talk to them, or even see them if they’re dangerous or unpleasant.
Growing in holiness via other people might mean daily difficult encounters, humiliating mistakes, and clashes with awful personalities.
At other times it might mean joyful connections, happy conversations, real support, and a sense that we’re all pulling in the same direction. Let’s go back to that person in the mirror. Not everyone likes you or gets along well with you.
Perhaps this might be because of the kind of team member you are. Are you the control freak, the lazy one, the would-be martyr, or too proud to ask for help? Becoming holier also means growing in knowledge of your own limitations and faults and slowly correcting them.
The nice part about this process is that it can make you appreciate the skills and gifts of other people who are completing the same group assignment. My point is that we can’t get out of this group assignment. We’re absolutely committed to it.
We signed up for this at baptism, and the details are all in the Gospels. We have specific tasks that we need to carry out.
We also have regular meetings that we’re all supposed to go to: daily prayer, regular sacramental confession, and Sunday Mass. These meetings can’t be held via email or WhatsApp.
In the end, we will be judged on love. And the only way we can really show that love is to treat other people in the way God expects of us.
And the marks for this group assignment will be individual – but they will also be final.
